Are we there yet?
	No, were on the bus in Edinburgh.

	Are we there yet?
	No, we've only reached Glasgow bus station.

	Are we there yet?
	No, we're on the bus to Glasgow airport.

	Sunset!
	Yes, ... from Glasgow airport.

	Cool!

	My `plane.

	At last! Mambo!
	Chilling out watching the stars.

	Traditional drink at Joe Spoons in the West End

	With enough beer, and a squint, the remnant of the head looks like a polar bear.

	First pull!!!
	Garden of Eden.

	The other bears gather round for my tale.'Conticuere omnes intentique ora tenebant.'

	... After sunset and dinner at Coastline ...

	... with a glass of wine and my favourite desert:
	Coastline's unique lemon rose sorbet. Yum! (But I preferred the blue plate from last year.)

	... I went on to Eden for Judgement Sunday ...
	Thanks Jules!

	... starting with my favourite drink: VRB!
	In the new VIP bar.

	Then, downstairs to join the fun ...

	... dancing under the flag.

	I want to be a cage dancer?

	Later I met Jules' minder ...
	Good chap.

	... and grappled with Paparazzi!
	(The Daily Star snap me with Jules and Amanda.)

	After surviving a Mixmag interview, I pull.

	Later, after more dancing, I return to the Chill Out balcony to see the dawn

	Shhh!
	More aspirin.

	Later, I take the ferry across to San An..

	The new bar at Mambo, ...
	... where the staff remember me.

	Beer, cigs and a seat ...

	... for a cool sunset.

	A tourist boat approaches ...

	... and stops for them to take my photo.

	Then on to Cafe del Mar ...
	... for my favourite VRB substitute (Carajillo: Espresso and brandy)

	Later, at the Manumission pre-party at Bar M, ...
	... I meet Andy McKay. I suggest he should start a Rock Night in Ibiza.

	I think she's promoting some bar.
	The flier said 'Secret Garden'

	ManumitTed gets ready to party.
	ManumitTed was being sold by John Lewis. Manumissio vindicta was achieved! I acted as adsertor and borrowed a pen (I pretended it was made of brass) to use as

	A game of cards while we wait.
	I seem to have a spare ace.

	Kumharas around in the Bay ...

	... where I make a new friend ...

	... but the sunset is obscured ...
	... by cloud.

	Kumharas is a really chilled place.

	Fridge offers to share his coke ...
	... in exchange for some of our Bacardi and Tequila.

	That was a mistake!.

	From the ferry across to San An.
	it looks like tonight will have a good sunset.

	A cocktail and the sunset at SunSea Bar.

	Unfortunately, there is cloud on the horizon ...

	... so I miss the setting sun ...

	... but the cloud colours are cool.

	A trophy from the Harris hedgehog cull?

	On the way out I met one of the Eden house staff...
	... who helped with my impromptu flying lesson at Judgement Sunday.

	At Lashed in Eden, I pull.

	But I prefer to dance.

	The music is excellent.

	While resting upstairs, ...

	... they set off the compressed air 'smoke'.
	Adiabatic expansion: COOL!

	Back at the hotel with the 'king' of receptionists.

	Fridge wants to chill.

	Fortunately, there is a seal on the vodka.

	ManumitTed, Stunt Treble and Fridge demand vodka.
	What's that little word? NOW!

	Back to Coastline to reflect on the sun.

	Then watch the sunset before dinner ...

	... rounded off with a cruel glass of brandy!
	My favourite restaurant in Ibiza: great staff, great food!

	Later, Tonic has a private party for me at Eden.

	The Eden pub crawl.
	The Back Room bar.

	Furthest from the entrance.

	Clockwise, on the other side of the pool.

	Under the new stair.

	Island by the entrance.

	Opposite the Back Room.

	The other Back Room bar.

	Garden of Eden.

	With enough Dutch courage, I try podium dancing.

	Then onto the decks ...

	... before basking in the crowd's admiration.

	She wants me.

	I like being a DJ ...

	... groupies!

	Back at the hotel I meet the rep. ...
	... who is just back from the Cram opening party.

	Last day. Where did all these bottle tops come from?

	ContenTed - we love Eden.

	Final sunset at Mambo.

	Excellent sunset for the start of Pacha's 30th birthday.
	I don't want to leave.

	Chilling out: bring your own ice.

	Beware - you could catch crabs.

	Iceberg.

	Pacha party fireworks
	I want to stay.

	Final dinner at the Curry Club.
	Tasty!!

	Au revoir San An.
	I'll be back!

	Good bye Juan Carlos.

	Sniff!

	Yes? Just checking the Duty Free.

Polar Ted's e-mail address is PolarTed@polarted.com